So…..yesterday, I posted the article ‘Rules That Guys Wish Girls Knew’ and I have to say, I still find some of those rules hilarious even though the meaning within and behind the words rang very true. In case you are wondering, YES, those rules were created by man simply for the benefit of themselves (not by women who THINK they know what men think). In this,and I assume the reason for creating the rules is that, women can be more educated–so to speak–about the male mind and in the long wrong understand their men and thus benefiting from this knowledge as well.
Guys, I know sometimes you rarely can seem to understand your woman. Heck, we are the most complicated creatures that exist! This list is for you too… if you want to be prepared on how to better understand her rants and rages or just simply know what to do, what NOT to do and HOW to do it. Women can be very frustrating, we know, but bear with us please. We really can’t help it! Behind it all, we are just gentle beings who are afraid of getting hurt so we allow even the tiniest things to tick us off. We love you loads but we are easily threatened…and things you might consider as ‘simple’ really aren’t in our world.
On the other hand, speaking as a woman, I know that there are many things that we would just love to blurt to our men but do not–or cannot–find the courage to do so. Come on, you know what I’m talking about here 😉 : the moment he’s checking out another girl right in front of you… OR …you’re waiting endlessly for his phone call and it comes a whole decade later (exaggeration but that’s how long it feels like). So ladies, if you’re the type who is too shy to voice your feelings to your man at times, I have one key advice for you:
GET A COPY OF THESE RULES… SLAM IT DOWN BEFORE HIM AND SAY, “READ THIS.”
[DISCLAIMER: Be prepared to receive an earful about what he thinks is garbage and what he ‘knows’ is simply…..more garbage]
Lol. In the end, don’t you worry yourself about what he doesn’t agree to. As a guy, he WILL find some of it to reject. It’s purely in his nature. At the end of the day–and at the end of him reading those rules–the words would have sunk in, trust me. He WILL get the picture you’re so vividly painting!!
SO HERE THEY ARE:
1. Don’t tell us when you think other girls are hot.
2. We know you might have crushes…but do keep them in their place. It’s YOUR duty to do so. We don’t have time for that drama.
3. We love when you brag and boast about us. Makes us feel cherished.
4. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
5. There is no such thing as too much spooning.
6. We think about you ALL the time.
7. This is how we see it . . . Don’t call = Don’t Care.
8. Which also means that if we don’t call, take the hint.
9. We like you to be a little jealous . . . but overly possessive is not necessary.
10. We hate that you can eat all you want and not get fat (some of us, at least).
11. Return favours: we massage, you massage; we go down, you go down; we shave, you shave (and not just your face).
12. Foreplay is not an option . . . its a prerequisite.
13. We’re allowed to be late . . . you are not.
14. Eye contact is key.
15. Don’t take longer to get ready than we do.
16. Laugh at our jokes.
17. Three words . . . honesty, honesty, honesty.
18. Groupies are UNACCEPTABLE.
19. We never have to wonder if your orgasm was real.
20. Do not start with us. You will not win.
21. Would you like it if a guy treated your sister that way? We didn’t think so.
22. If you ask nicely, we usually answer the same way.
23. We will never have enough clothes or shoes!
24. We have an excuse to act bitchy at least once a month.
25. Open the door for us no matter where we are . . . even at our house and getting into the car.
26. We love surprises!
27. We liked to be kissed softly, not with an iron tongue.
28. Pay attention to the little things we do, because they mean the most.
29. Boxers and maybe boxer briefs sometimes . . . NEVER whitey-tighties, NEVER!
30. Clean your room before we come over.
31. Always brush your teeth before you see us . . . a fresh mouth and white teeth are a necessity.
32. We always want to talk to you. Us having an argument does not give you the right to not call.
33. Even though you are sometimes insensitive and hurt us, we still love you with everything we are.
34. ALWAYS introduce us as your girlfriend. ‘Friend’? That’s what you’d be if you don’t.
35. Don’t act hard around your friends because I won’t make you hard tonight.
36. Sometimes “NO!” really means “NO!”
37. “Wife Beaters” are not an adequate form of fashion.
38. If we wanted to be on video tape, we’d be a porn star not your girlfriend.
39. Sensitive guys are great . . . but crying more than we do in a movie just isn’t right.
40. Don’t let ex-girlfriends cause drama, relationships are stressful enough.
41. It takes a special kind of stupid to forget birthdays.
42. Guys who are good cuddlers = guys who know how to satisfy a woman.
43. “Fat Chicks” have feelings too.
44. Silent treatment, shoulder shrugs, tears, yelling and nasty looks all add up to . . . YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG!
45. If you are not a good dancer, please be self-aware.
46. Just because a girl doesn’t pick up on the first ring doesn’t mean she’s not waiting by the phone.
47. You don’t have to spend a lot, if it means a lot.
48. Don’t say you love me if you don’t mean it.
49. Don’t lie to us . . . we will catch you.
50. When the girls get together, we talk about EVERYTHING. Meaning my best friends know everything about you.
HAVE ALL THAT IN CHECK AND WE’LL BE THE HAPPIEST GIRL YOU’LL EVER HAVE. IN OTHER WORDS…YOU CAN STOP SWEATING NOW! 😉